“Good friends better than pocket money!”
I can say that definitively and will shout it from any rooftop. They say it takes a village to raise a child…well I couldn’t deal with and handle my situation without my village; my circles – inner, outer, family & friends and otherwise. I seriously don’t know what I would do without them. I’m pretty independent all things considered, I do what I need to do when i need to do it but there are times when MARTA, Lyft/Uber and all the other services I use just won’t cut it. Sometimes I feel bad asking for something but then when I actually voice the thought, I usually get a good bouf before we move on to the point of the conversation. Having people around you who care just makes things that much easier to deal with. I wish that I can remember telling everyone around me about my diagnosis but I have absolutely no recollection, and for the most part, I’m not alone. It was new territory for all of us and I had to figure things out as I went along and everyone was there with me for the ride. I wrote this paragraph last month sometime and 2 weekends ago, I was talking to QueenY and she used this exact phrase, “…we are all along for the ride.” Someone told me once that she was amazed that I was always everywhere with my friends and one of the things that I told her was that I didn’t think that they’d have it any other way. I feel comfortable saying that my friends will be along for the ride whether good or bad.
When I speak about my circles, I’m also referring to people whom I don’t even know on a personal basis. I am a loyal customer – I’ve been going to my barber since 95ish, the nail salon just as long, my eyebrow place? since the early 2000s. I have a friend who will stop anywhere when she needs to have something done – that’s not me; I stick with who I know will do a good job. Anyways, all of these people knew me as a “normal”, regular person and they’ve seen me progress from walking “funny” with no assistive devices, then using my canes, now using the walker and if I’m by myself (majority of the time), I’m in my scooter. While they all may not understand the disease itself, they all know that I have something and each time I’m in the various stores, they go out of their way to ensure my comfort and/or safety.
If I didn’t have these circles in my life, I cyah lie, dealing with all that this disease throws at me at times would be unbearable. Truth be told, there still are times when I’m bewildered at how positive I am handling everything because that just wasn’t my nature all along. I think it’s the positivity and my amiable manner that help those around me to stay positive and upbeat as well. If strangers or someone new is helping me, I tell them specifically what to do but I also instruct in a way to make them as comfortable as possible while smiling and joking when I can because I know that most times, it probably is more uncomfortable for them than whatever the situation at the point in time is for me. I was having a conversation with another disabled person the other day and they told me that I was so much better at it than they were. In response, I told them that I was lucky to have a good support system and that really goes a long way. I was saddened when I asked about their support system and the response was, “ha! almost no system at all.” I cannot even imagine what it must be like to navigate our lives with little or no support.
I love my circles – inner, outer, peripherals, toutebagai! If you are reading this and you know that you live in said circle – I appreciate you, not sure what I’d do without you. I love you!
