I was never a girly girl. I didn’t need 2 hours to get ready for anything – especially when I had the “come to Jesus” moment and realized that hair on my head is overrated and completely unnecessary. I could be ready to do whatever at the drop of a hat. Anytime J told me that he was picking me up at 5 (and I learned that unlike a lot of Trinis, when he said 5, he meant 5), I was ready to jump in the car at 5. I wear makeup but it is not a shitload of gunk on my face and so the time needed to apply it is minimal. I could go on…but you get the gist and long story short, I was never a “high maintenance” person. That is…until now. Steups. I always say that multiple sclerosis has made me so damn high maintenance that it’s downright annoying. Everything has to be “just so” or “just right” for me to indulge/participate etc. I cannot do everything willy-nilly like I used to anymore – I’ve talked about the due diligence steps that I sometimes take before – not getting into that right now but the shit gets tired.
Sunday was the regular monthly bike ride with Catalyst. J and I usually go down together because he rides the same trail that Catalyst uses. It’s always from 10-12, so we get there at 10, he leaves to go do his thing and by 10:30, I’m “gearsed” up, on a bike (read MY bike) and ready to roll with at least one of the Catalyst volunteers. Catalyst has a fleet of adaptive bikes (hand powered, foot powered, upright, recumbent…you name it, they have at least one) and through much trial, error, frustration and a lot of cussing, I finally found the best bike for me – hence the “MY bike” description prior. It’s an upright, foot pedaled, nifty lil thing – it’s too low to the ground for me to get in and out of on my own but everything else is “just right” for me to get a good ride in. Last month, I did 3.5 miles and I was BEAT by the time I got home, but it felt so damn good. Anyhoo, Sunday was a little different because he was going to do a 60mile ride, so I didn’t get there till 11 and so, by the time I got there, MY bike was gone. Here’s where the high maintenance frustrations came in. My bike is compact so when I sit on it and start pedaling, my legs remain bent (even at the greatest angle); they never actually stretch out enough to the point where it’s difficult to bend my left leg (that likes to be stiff and straight out) and bring it back in. The first other bike I tried on Sunday was long and stretched out so you know what happened. I had suspicions, but figured I’d try anyway but after 2 rotations, that left leg straightened up and I had THE MOST DIFFICULT time bending it to bring it back in – I don’t even think I made 1/2 mile. Writing and describing the problems with the second one will take too much time and words but suffice it to say that I rode even less than the first. It was annoying, frustrating, depressing and I always feel bad for the volunteers with me, even though they have always been good sports about everything. I’m not going late ever again. Truth be told, I really want to put a “StaxBike” license plate on it, but I guess that is not acceptable and might be frowned upon 🙂
In other news, I’ve started experiencing a weird pain. and by weird, I mean really weird. I’m not trying to be dramatic here but imagine someone took the divider or compass from your geometry tin and jammed it in your armpit and then dragged it down your arm to your hand. It’s a jolt of pain that starts in my armpit and travels very quickly down my arm. I’ve never experienced anything like this before, in fact never any pain at all. The first time I felt it was April 8th (a Friday) and it happened once a day till the Sunday (odd). Didn’t feel anything again until last week but now, it’s happening multiple times throughout the day and even at night. At this point, it’s more annoying than anything else, course it’s painful too but I think that because it actually only lasts a few seconds at a time, I don’t have enough time to study the pain. I also can’t pin it down to my arm being in a certain position or figure out any kind of explanation at all, so I just have to suck it up and keep it moving – ugh! I actually have a doctor’s appointment later today so I’ll bring it up and see what suggestions he might have. Another MRI might be in order…is it a new lesion? If that’s the case, do I have to live with this? Geez…I’m not really looking forward to what he has to say I don’t think. Anyway, more to come I suppose.
MS sucks!
