One of the most frustrating things (for me) about having MS is not knowing. MS is such that it affects everyone in different ways (altho there are some constants) and there is just no telling what could happen to u at any given time. I mentioned in an earlier post that I spent 4 days in bed, just as the new year broke, so I hadn’t been on the computer or doing much of anything at the time. On my first day back to work, I noticed that BOTH my arms were somewhat heavy and typing wasn’t as easy as it should have been. My arms weren’t numb – they just felt kinda weak/lethargic (i know that that is not really a word to describe my arms; i’m just trying to get my point across). thank goodness i din’t have to handwrite anything or else i would have been screwed! Was this something else that i’m going to have to deal with??? As it turns out I’m back to normal – maybe after being “off” for 3 weeks, my body just had to get back in the groove of things? who really knows.
A few months ago, i was taking a shower and felt something under my foot. I tried to remove whatever was under my feet and that’s when i realized that THERE WAS NOTHING THERE!! The best way i can describe it is that all day long, it felt like i was standing on gravel while barefoot. It was then that i realized that the soles of my feet (only the left foot) and my legs up to my knees (both legs) were actually numb. That lasted for about 3 months or so and just like that things went back to normal.
I heard a story about someone i know who woke up one day a few weeks ago and couldn’t see. Long story short, turns out that his doctors are almost 100% sure that he has MS.
Everyday i wake up and hope that nothing will strike! In addition, when something odd happens, i immediately wonder if it’s a new sympton that i will have to deal with. Having MS has made me very aware of my body and any changes that i experience. Now, as soon as i notice something odd happening, i make sure to be aware of when it started, how long it lasted, exactly how it affected me etc. Oftentimes, i hope that it’s just my “old” body doing its thing to get thru the day.
In the words of Blinders Off, a fellow blogger, “Living with multiple sclerosis is like a box of chocolate. You never know how it will affect you the next minute, hour, or day.”