that Fear of Falling

Funny – falling is no longer a big fear of mine really; the fear is now the effect of the fall.  Unfortunately, falling has become a part of my life…when i fall, i hope for a “good” fall – no injuries, no pain, nothing; I can laugh, get up and go on with my life.  Now, don’t get me wrong, of course i don’t want to fall and i always try to stop it from happening, but when it does, i brace myself and hope for the best!

The other day i was working out with Reggie, my personal trainer who’s really good with me and understands that i need extra help to get from here to there, most times.  He let me go for a brief second to go put away some weights and i felt myself starting to topple over.  A few loud noises/half screams and he was right there at my side, even though it turned out to be a false alarm and i was able to “catch” myself.

Nite before last, I said to G, as i was making my way up the 1st flight of stairs, “good thing we live in this house”…she didn’t understand because of course at the time i was actually making my way up the 1001 steps that we have.  I explained…the house in which we lived prior also had steps of course, but it’s the steps leading up to the house that would have been a bitch for me.  There were only about 6 and they were wide BUT there was no railing AND it was flanked by those prickly shrubs ON BOTH SIDES.  I have a vision in my head of falling off those steps and into the bush – the picker bush – ACK!!!  (it actually makes me feel a lil ill)

thank goodness it will never happen as i have absolutely no reason to ever go back to that house but…

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