One of the ways that it can affect us is with bladder control. Some patients may not be able to control their bladders whilst others may not even be able to empty their bladders (no consistency either!!!!) for me, sometimes I pee just because there is a bathroom around – not necessarily because i have to pee, but because there is a bathroom i don’t mind using available. I never let it get to the point where my bladder is about to buss because if i get to that point, my ass is grass – there’s no holding it for me!
I noticed that every now and again something would happen to me so i said to G, “you ever had to pee, used the bathroom and then u notice after you’re done and u leave the bathroom (mind u) that, “shit! i have to go again?” Of course she said no and as usual, we moved on…i chalked it up to one of those things that just happens sometimes i guess. I subscribe to the MS Society’s monthly publication and 1 day i was reading it and i saw an article on the bladder control issue and it spoke about patients’ not being able to empty their bladders and it hit me, “what the?!?!?! i guess that’s what i’ve been experiencing” i’d never thought that it was the MS – for once i didn’t blame it and it actually is to blame. When it happens, it’s only at nite – i drink so much water (i always say, the only things i drink are water and alcohol, i don’t mess with juice and sweet drink and all the other shit out there) that sometimes i have to get up 2 or 3 times to pee at nite – well when i do use the bathroom and get back into bed to go back to sleep, that’s when it give me a nudge and says, “eh eh…we not done yet” so i have to get back out of the bed and head back to the bathroom.
I’ve had conversations with the MS, “i mean, do u really think that it’s necessary to put me thru this???? i mean i have to get out the bed, stumble to the bathroom, pee, stumble back to bed, lie down to start going back to sleep and THEN u decide to let me know that “oh by theway, u’re not done yet” so i have to start the whole bloody process al over AGAIN!!!” i mean…really?!??!?! UNNECESSARY walking is not something i ever look forward to; i try to save my walking for when i absolutely must do it and in my book, this situation counts as completely unnecessary and uncalled for.
Don’t get me wrong, i still know that my situation is not the worst (for sure) and maybe MS isn’t the worst, but it sure is damn bad!!